Child Development

This section provides parents with the information they need to help each of their children grow and develop to their full potential.  We provide information on the stages of growth and development from baby to teen.  We also offer tips on how parents can encourage and direct children in the right direction.

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Birth Order  Where a child places in the birth order can have an effect on how he sees himself. Research on birth order, sometimes referred to as ordinal position, shows that first born children are more likely to go to college than children in any other position in the family. These apply to "typical families" and probably do not apply to "dysfunction families" and may vary across various cultures.

Parents should attempt to help each child to see themselves as unique individuals and avoid comparisons with siblings or others. 

The middle child often seems to have the most negative impressions of his lot in life. One approach to help middle children reframe things is to point out that in a sense they have the best of both worlds. They are the youngest to the older sibling and the oldest to the younger sibling. Therefore they are both a big brother/sister and a little brother/sister. Younger children always want to be able to do the things older siblings are allowed to do. And older siblings may feel that the younger siblings get away with things they were not able to when they were the same age. . . . .

Coping With Your Child's Personality  Ever feel frustrated by your high-energy baby? What can you do about a child who screams himself silly when he doesn't get his own way? A youngster who gets overexcited when a playmate come over?

The experts tell us that there's probably not a lot you can go about changing the way a child tends to reach if that tendency is inborn but there are ways you can help him manage his impulses better - and spare yourself lots of grief along the way.



Realize that your child's immature behavioral style is not your "fault" because temperament is biological not something he learned from you. Still it is within your power to help your child cope with his temperament - and eventually to understand himself better instead of feeling sorry for yourself for having a noisy, distractible or shy child. Learn to accept this as his nature and then develop a strategy to help him adapt in a socially acceptable way. Replace a victimized mind-set with an adult resolve to help your child ameliorate his difficulties. Above all, remember that all temperamental qualities can be shaped to work to a child's advantage if they are sensibly managed. . . . .


Multiple Intelligences In Howard Gardner’s Frames of Mind, he proposes that there are seven main areas in which all people have special skills; he calls them intelligences. His research at Harvard University was in response to the work that Alfred Binet had done in France around 1900. Binet’s work led to the formation of an intelligence test; we are all familiar with the “intelligence quotient,” or “IQ,” the way that intelligence is measured on his test.



This type of IQ test was used as the basis of another one with which most of us are familiar: the Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT), which is taken my most college-bound high school students. Both of these tests look predominantly at two types of intelligences: verbal and math. If a person does well on these, s/he is considered “intelligent,” and is a candidate for one of the better colleges or universities. But what about everyone else? How many of you who are reading these words have used the phrase “not good at taking tests,” when talking either about yourself or your child? 


The Multiple Intelligences (MI) theory proposes that there are other measures of intelligence beside these two. I offer this information to you so that you can understand that while many teachers have some knowledge of MI theory, most of our schools are not fully set up to use it to the advantage of all students. That being the case, perhaps you can either (1) be involved in helping your child’s teachers and school to provide a more balanced program that develops his intelligences that are not more included in the curriculum or (2) find activities outside of the school environment in which your child can develop his dominant areas of intelligence. 

You should also know that MI theory posits that each of us has, to some degree or another, all of these intelligences. Some of them are simply more developed than others. Furthermore, we are all able to improve our ability in each of these areas. . . . .

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